“You’re the best project you’ll ever work on. Never give up on reaching your potential – it’s a lifelong marathon.”
Her, April 2024
So real talk. Last night I was on a call with a friend, and she was telling about all the new, fun and interesting things happening in her life. At the start, I was like “Yay! This is awesome”…and then the more she got into it, the more I began once again to draw parallels to my life – and drain all the joy from it. The next thing that triggered me was her speaking about making plans with another friend (I thought I’d be the first contact). I have to realize no one is anyone’s. We are all living on borrowed time and every person in our lives has a time, place and reason.
I did want to reflect on why the unconscious comparison brought me down. I thought it could be a number of things:
- I’m currently at a slow place at work so not too much occupying my mind
- I’ve been feeling a bit uninspired and unchallenged recently
- From the outside it seems like everything in her life seems to be going amazing.
- There are a number of people in my life who seem to have a ton going on (more than I do at the moment)
- I would like to have new experiences and meet new people which I haven’t been doing much lately
- I’m getting bored of my routine (but it also somewhat grounds me too)
- I haven’t found something I’ve truly been invested in (a.k.a. what’s my purpose? what do I truly enjoy doing)
It’s okay to feel this way and acknowledge that I do. But what’s even more important is that I take the right action and ask myself “What am I going to do about it?”. I also think there’s merit in recognizing that constantly drawing parallels between other people’s lives and mine isn’t going to help me find my “thing”. And constantly forcing myself to do what other people are doing in their lives isn’t going to get me there either. The best thing for me to do right now is – look inward, be grateful for what i do have, and spread the joy for other people’s successes. Because if I were in their shoes I wouldn’t want anyone wishing ill on me. So right here right now, I’m going to abandon that thought process. Here’s the if-then function:
If
You’re feeling low because of a high in someone else’s life
Then
- First, do something that makes you happy (your favorite drink, your favorite song, a show you like).
- Deep breathes and detach yourself from the moment; see your emotions flowing like water.
- Recognize you’re writing your own chapter – your uniqueness comes from doing different things that make you happy. Nothing will come out of looking at someone else’s journey.
- Ask yourself: “What are you going to do about it?” Make plans for the future.
And remember, truly successful people are those that root for other’s success and fortune – everything happens for the right reason and the right time – yours will come soon too, my friend.